mizz a lot of thing =)

6.11 p.m

erm bosan ke penat yg menjadi sbb aku mls nk study?? memang malas kot.. huhu bagus gak cadangan lai g bercuti 2.. tp agak awal kot ntok memikirkannya.. exam pn xabes g beb.. haha miz my hani.. hope dpt jmp u xlame g.. da lame xbergosip ngan u.. huhu

tetibe je i miz kl so much.. miz the people there 2.. miz karaoke hari2.. miz the view @ nyte there.. miz bersesak2 nek rapid g keje.. miz jln ipoh.. miz karaoke kat ampang point.. miz bukit ampang.. miz keramat.. miz tasik titiwangsa.. miz greenwood.. miz gombak.. miz makan tomyam kt gombak.. miz uptown.. miz pasar rabu kt tepi umah.. miz lepak kat ampang.. banyaknya benda yg aku miz..huhu

xsabar nk turun kl pas exam.. da lame xrase angin malam kl.. haha banyaknya kenangan kt sane wlupun xlame aku stay kt sane.. kalo la bole ulang blk sume 2.. erm mesti besh.. xpe2.. kan de date kt sane xlame g.. wee beshnya.. jom karaoke puas2 yunk =)

Again...

3.23 a.m

Looks like i still cant concentrate with my study.. this feeling really disturbing me.. why at this night?? why at this critical time?? what will happen with my study? i also cant answer that question.. there's so many things in my mind rite now.. it's all about u.. i cant stop this thinking and feeling even i want it damn much.. its killing me u know.. slowly and slowly..

maybe u even dont care about that.. have u ever care what i feel? what i want? what i need? what i see? and everything about me... maybe u dont ever feel my existence here...

All things come to my mind at the same time.. the past, the present, the sweet, the hurt, the happiness, the sadness.. all blend in my mind.. i keep thinking why the situation can change in a blink of eyes.. my heart feel empty at this time.. it have keep so many secret of my life.. the secret that will never know by anyone except Allah.. i feel a lil bit tired 2.. tired to chase happiness.. tired to chase a love of my life.. tired to chase dreaming of my life.. should i stop from chasing them?? if i stop, what will happen after this?? can i still go on with the most empty & lonely world?? can i accept the fact to losing the love of my life AGAIN???

AGAIN........... i do no how if i have to face it again.. really cant imagine it.. cant u do something about that? are u think that be with me again is a mistake?? is it really a mistake???? let me know if u get the answer later...

u know that i alwayz waiting 4 u here.. do u want me to waiting 4 u forever.. without any answer?? do u think that it is fair 2 me?? is it my job here is jz 2 waiting 4 u?? i tell u now what i want & what i expect from u..

it is jz a ONE thing.. i jz want 2 feel ur LOVE.. u are the one who offer that 2 me rite.. u have agreed to love me rite.. so why now u jz leave me alone here?? without any words.. u have ur own world.. and u jz leave me in my lonely world.. i alwayz waiting 4 u here.. in this lonely world.. do u still feel my existence here? can i ask u 1 question that i hate most?? is it ur love is still 4 me.. or u have lose it... only u know that answer... ME?? still standing here waiting and waiting for a guy that i LOVE MOST in this world.. do no until when........

What way should i choose...

2.05 a.m...

I suppose to be study my FAR rite now because thursday will be the day to sit 4 my first paper.. But why i can't concentrate with my study.. I'm a lil bit tired rite now coz i jz got 2 hours sleep yesterday.. but it also feel scary to sleep at this time & jz let the time go on like dats..

Today, something strange happen to me.. Erm maybe not today.. It already happen before. i jz not really care about that.. But today it maybe worse than before. i jz feel a lil bit scary.. do no what happen to myself.. i even do no what should i do.. should i care about that.. or jz leave it like that..

Today i keep thinking what way should i choose for my life.. which way is better for me.. I feel like i am living in a fake world, dreaming world or imagination world.. i do no what to call that.. Is it true that i'm jz dreaming here?? where should i found the real world? should i get out from this world?? It feel like nothing left here for me.. this world is not belong to me anymore.. I cant decide yet what should i do.. Hope Allah will bless me and show me the real way of my life...

Hari Khamis...

Once again, berakirlah hari ini [khamis].. satu lagi hari yang memenatkan dan menyedihkan jugak.. Petang tadi sibuk siapkan group assingment with laini, ayu, bida n sal. Malam ni study MAF plak utk test esok. Nak kena siapkan drama mandarin n outline BEL plak lepas ni. See.. hari baru pun bermula dengan kesibukan. Bila la nak merasa hari yang menenangkan lagi. xsabar tunggu cuti sem. igt nak jalan2 dgn kawan2 cuti nanti. tapi masih dalam planninng lagi. entahkan jadi entahkan tidak... Entahkan org sudi, entahkan tidak....

Kenapa malam ni berakhir dgn kesedihan lagi?? 1 soalan yg menyimpan pelbagai jawapan..

Bila kita menyayangi dan alwayz take care psl someone, of cos kita mahu dia melakukan perkara yang sama pada kita kan? salah ke kalo kita mengharapkan sedikit balasan dari dia? Tapi orang kata andai kita menyayangi seseorang, kita hanya ingin melihat dia bahagia bukan mengharap balasan dari dia.. So what happen to the person yg love org 2? dia jz bole tgk je ke? dia xpayah rasa bahagia ke?? dat's very unfair to that person.. Is't world really that mean???

Macam mane pulak dengan masalah communication in relationship? Boleh berjaya ke 1 hubungan 2 kalo xde 2 way communication? Kalo jz salah sorg je yg trying hard 2 make things better but lg sorg buat xtau je, boleh berhasil ke?? Inilah selalunya the big problem dalam relationship. masalah komunikasi...

Erm masing-masing boleh berfikir kot.. and x salah kalo kita fikirkan perasaan org lain jugak.. x boleh la nak pentingkan diri sendiri je. cuba letakkan diri kita kat tempat org lain jugak.. feel how u will feel if u in dat person's place.. maybe kita akan lebih memahami perasaan org lain..

Buat lah pilihan yang terbaik.. Mungkin ia pilihan yang tepat atau mungkin juga akan membuatkan kita menyesal di kemudian hari. Tapi 2 semua kan ketentuan Allah.. bak kata orang, mungkin de hikmah di sebalik setiap kejadian 2.. Tunggu dan lihat dan sabar je la.. sabar sabar sabar.... Sabar lagi... banyaknya kena sabar, cam penat je... ala biasa la, hari2 pun kena penat.... MUNIRAH HANI TARMIZI Be STRONG and INDEPENDENT....

Masa kebosanan dan ketidoran :P

Aku banyak kerja nak kena buat ni, tapi xtau kenapa cam mengantuk sangat. so aku ngah cuba nak menghilangkan rase mengantuk aku ni.. aku tgh buat assignment CRG. sok kne hntr b4 pukul 4. bgs tol xsiap g. sume pn last minute.. bese la 2 kan.. hehe..

Da la ngan selsema aku xbaik2 lg ni.. dun worry, i da mkn ubat k.. hehe.. 2 yg tmbh makin mengantuk di buatnya.. Beshnya kalo dpt bermalas-malasan di atas tilam empukku.. haha.. Jom sape nak join.. dalam mimpi ar tapi :P

Erm.. windulah kat my cayunk.. u sombunk ngan i eh?? xpe xpe.. xmo kwn u.. Wekk :P
waa pe la yang aku mrepek ni.. sory ar kalo de sape2 yg bace aku merapu ni eh.. ini cuma luahan org yg tgh mengantuk.. haha

tapi mmg betul windu dia pn.. org kate kalo kte rindu someone, mesti org 2 pun rindu kte.. agak2 betul x eh bnd 2?? erm xtau la saye.. wee :P

To my cayunk; I love u so much, miz u so much... Muaahh =)

Hidup aku..

dah lame xtls blog ni.. saje je nak meluahkan isi hati yg xde org nk dengar pn.. betul gak kata pepatah 'ku sangka panas sampai ke petang, rupanya hujan di tengah hari'.. memang betul terkena kat aku.. kadang2 kita terlalu mengharapkan sesuatu yg indah je akan berlaku dalam hidup kita.. kita memang akan terleka bila kegembiraan itu menjenguk kita utk sejenak.. kita lupa yang esok mungkin kita akan menangis pula.. hidup mmg ibarat roda.. kalo hari ni kita bahagia, mungkin esok ada gelombang yang akan merobohkan benteng kebahagiaan kita 2.. Ya.. memang kita kena redha suratan dan takdir kehidupan ni.. tapi walaubagaimanapun, kita tetap xdapat lari dari rase kecewa dan sedih.. semua ni mmg lumrah hidup manusia.. Tuhan je yg boleh mengubah semua tu..

Kadang2 aku xsangka aku akan berada di sini.. menjadi seorang pelajar kembali.. tapi aku tau ini memang keputusan terbaik yg aku dah buat.. kalo x mungkin aku akan terus hanyut oleh arus dunia entah ke mana.. alhamdulillah aku dah jumpa kawan terbaik kat sini.. thankz kat korang sebab sudi terima ira sbg kawan korang.. laini, bida, sal, ayu and all my classmates here.. tapi hani n maz, korang alwayz dalam hati aku.. thankz sebab da byk tolong aku, same2 susah senang dgn aku..

Actually esok aku ade test, tapi rase hati xtenang.. dat's why xboleh nak tido lg.. cube nak menenangkan hati kat sini.. Aku sedang menunggu seseorang utk berterus-terang dgn aku.. dia tiba2 menjauhkan diri dari aku..mungkin aku ade buat sesuatu yg menyinggung hati dia.. aku pun xde jawapannya.. hanya dia yg tau perkara sebenar.. the truth is, i miz him so much.. dah lame xdgr suara dia berborak mesra dgn aku, ketawa dgn aku, bergurau-senda dgn aku... feel like i've lost him.. but i hope it will never happend...its too scary even jz to think about......