Again...

3.23 a.m

Looks like i still cant concentrate with my study.. this feeling really disturbing me.. why at this night?? why at this critical time?? what will happen with my study? i also cant answer that question.. there's so many things in my mind rite now.. it's all about u.. i cant stop this thinking and feeling even i want it damn much.. its killing me u know.. slowly and slowly..

maybe u even dont care about that.. have u ever care what i feel? what i want? what i need? what i see? and everything about me... maybe u dont ever feel my existence here...

All things come to my mind at the same time.. the past, the present, the sweet, the hurt, the happiness, the sadness.. all blend in my mind.. i keep thinking why the situation can change in a blink of eyes.. my heart feel empty at this time.. it have keep so many secret of my life.. the secret that will never know by anyone except Allah.. i feel a lil bit tired 2.. tired to chase happiness.. tired to chase a love of my life.. tired to chase dreaming of my life.. should i stop from chasing them?? if i stop, what will happen after this?? can i still go on with the most empty & lonely world?? can i accept the fact to losing the love of my life AGAIN???

AGAIN........... i do no how if i have to face it again.. really cant imagine it.. cant u do something about that? are u think that be with me again is a mistake?? is it really a mistake???? let me know if u get the answer later...

u know that i alwayz waiting 4 u here.. do u want me to waiting 4 u forever.. without any answer?? do u think that it is fair 2 me?? is it my job here is jz 2 waiting 4 u?? i tell u now what i want & what i expect from u..

it is jz a ONE thing.. i jz want 2 feel ur LOVE.. u are the one who offer that 2 me rite.. u have agreed to love me rite.. so why now u jz leave me alone here?? without any words.. u have ur own world.. and u jz leave me in my lonely world.. i alwayz waiting 4 u here.. in this lonely world.. do u still feel my existence here? can i ask u 1 question that i hate most?? is it ur love is still 4 me.. or u have lose it... only u know that answer... ME?? still standing here waiting and waiting for a guy that i LOVE MOST in this world.. do no until when........